I finally got a Wii Fit. Not that I was really trying to get one before, I just never saw one on the shelf at Best Buy all the both times I thought to look for one. But hey, it looked like it'd be fun. My Wii doesn't get used a whole lot. I'm not a big console gamer but the Wii has a different appeal than the Xbox 360. To me, console games mean Grand Theft Auto, Halo, Gran Turismo and so on. The Wii never really struck me as a real console, maybe because it doesn't come with a traditional controller. Since it doesn't have this console stigma attached to it I think it's more acceptable to play these odd kitschy games like Boom Blox and Wii Sports. Wii Fit is one such game that I'd never give a second thought if it were on the Xbox or PC but because it's on the Wii it just seems to make sense.
Wii Fit, for anyone who doesn't know, is a collection of short minigames that utilizes a balance board peripheral. These minigames are based around moving, balancing and pressure. The game tracks your progress through the course of your play. When you first log in to the game it creates a baseline by taking your weight, BMI and age. The Wii Fit board has a four sensors in it to track your movement and measure pressure so it isn't hard for the Wii to determine your actual weight. The machine does weigh you but you're able to lie to the Wii and tell it you have on eight pounds of clothing if you really want to. The other measurements, BMI and age are a little more tricky. The Wii relies on the user to be truthful (not that your life depends on it, but still...) and enter an accurate height and age. I was honest with my Wii and told it that I was 5'9" and 26 years old. It in turn told me that I have a BMI of just under 24 and that I should aim for a BMI of 22 otherwise I'll get sick and die.
I don't have a problem being told I would be better off losing a few pounds, that's a foregone conclusion for anyone who plays video games. What I have a problem with is the BMI scale. Penn & Teller did an episode of their show, Bullshit, on how the BMI scale is, well... bullshit. The Body Mass Index was developed by a Belgian in the 1850s as part of a 'social physics' experiment. The problem with the BMI is that it doesn't account for shit like muscle or fat... pretty basic stuff wouldn't you think? You see, muscle is heavier than fat, so people who are in good shape tend to rank as overweight on the BMI, while gamers who are fat tend to rank as 'normal.' Sounds like it's bullshit to me... If I were in shape I'd be pissed. Actually, I'd probably have better things to do...
The final metric that Wii Fit uses is age. Like I said, you can enter your own age into the configuration but the Wii Fit doesn't really give a damn. After you've completed a few rudimentary challenges such as leaning left and leaning to the right, the Wii will let you know how old it thinks you are. So there I am, I've told the Wii I'm 5'9 and I have a BMI just under 24 and I'm 26 years old, to which it replies that I am actually 39 years old. Yup, my failure to satisfactorily lean to the left or right coupled with decades of soda and fried snacks has shortened my life by thirteen years. And here's the kicker, I can get those thirteen years back but only by playing more Wii Fit. By mastering the fine art of leaning and doing imaginary hula hoops I can actually get younger.
It seems that Nintendo's Wiigineers have found what Ponce de León could not. Seriously though, it's a funny concept, "play our game or you will die a decade sooner than you thought." It's sort of like Grand Theft Auto IV telling you that you have to murder a rival drug dealer or he will come to your real life house and kill your family. Games like GTA have more going for it than the Wii Fit does though... The Wii Fit's graphics are practically nonexistent and what is there has absolutely no antialiasing whatsoever. Maybe the whole "fountain of youth" angle was just Nintendo hedging their bets. It seems to have paid off though, folks can't get themselves enough of the Wii Fit. If other game developers latch on to this fear mongering mechanic we might well be seeing it show up in some hilarious fashion in other new games.
Witness the Wii Fit's stunning 16bit graphics!